My little Princess,
Kinsey Jewel,
I'm so excited for the stage that you are starting. You just started eating rice cereal and oatmeal cereal- and loving it. Although I'm not sure what you love more, eating or making a mess. You are all smiles for just about everyone and that is so much fun. You also have a mischievous side, already. I can't believe that in a week and a half you'll be 6 months old. Has it really been that long ago? Is it just the lack of sleep that makes time go by in such a strange, new way? I love you so much. I can't even describe it. You are sure being used by God to teach me a lot of things, the hardest right now for me....patience.
Love your Momma,
Heather Jo
May 26, 2010
May 13, 2010
Exhaustion
Oh Kinsey Jewel,
I really thought by this time I would be feeling energized and "like my old self" again. I'm beginning to realize that I will never be my old self again. Its impossible. My body has changed, my priorities have changed, my available time has changed. I look at pictures from 3 years ago, and think, "I want that Heather back". But then I wouldn't have you and that is not acceptable. Maybe there are some things I'll just have to accept about myself. I'll never be a size 6, I'll never feel energetic or rested again, I'll never have cash flow, or income that isn't spoken for, I'll never be free to workout twice a day...but I would never change it if it meant no Kinsey. I love you, and in the past 3 months, you've grown to bring me such joy and happiness. I know it will only get more complicated from here... but I am trying to enjoy each moment. Someday I'll feel rested (At least from time to time), and I won't care about that Heather in 2007. But for now I am transitioning, however poorly.
Even exhaustion doesn't change my love for you,
Your Momma,
Heather Jo
I really thought by this time I would be feeling energized and "like my old self" again. I'm beginning to realize that I will never be my old self again. Its impossible. My body has changed, my priorities have changed, my available time has changed. I look at pictures from 3 years ago, and think, "I want that Heather back". But then I wouldn't have you and that is not acceptable. Maybe there are some things I'll just have to accept about myself. I'll never be a size 6, I'll never feel energetic or rested again, I'll never have cash flow, or income that isn't spoken for, I'll never be free to workout twice a day...but I would never change it if it meant no Kinsey. I love you, and in the past 3 months, you've grown to bring me such joy and happiness. I know it will only get more complicated from here... but I am trying to enjoy each moment. Someday I'll feel rested (At least from time to time), and I won't care about that Heather in 2007. But for now I am transitioning, however poorly.
Even exhaustion doesn't change my love for you,
Your Momma,
Heather Jo
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