Dirty Whore

This morning I was watching myself in the mirror as I put on my makeup and I thought "what a whore I am". Let me explain.
Before I knew the Lord, before I experienced the guilt of my sin, before I had a thought in my head, He loved me and gave Himself for me. How many times do I whore myself out to other "loves"? Too many times, and yet He loves me, and blesses me. I can look back at my life and see that while I was wallowing in my sin He was planning a wonderful blessing for me. What!?! How can that be? Why?!?
I just think that while I was pregnant with you Kinsey, I was so focused on myself, on the way my life was going to change, on the pain I had to endure, I totally lost sight of the fact that God is so good- even when I'm not. In fact it seems as if His goodness is best when I'm at my worst. What an incredible love. I cannot comprehend it.
And so I am a whore. We are all whores if we think about it. But that doesn't mean that I have to submit to always being one. His love compells me to love only Him, to keep myself pure in an impure place. Kinsey, please know that although this world is enticing, exciting, and full of promises, it is empty. It will leave you used and empty. Don't let it turn you into a full-time whore my love, Protect yourself, envelop yourself in His arms, practice spiritual-monogamy, learn from my waste.
Love always,
Your momma, Heather Jo